BETTER BEATS.
batTrak Sonic Location System
Same ocean. Better ears.
OPERATIONAL batTrak STATUS
| Callsign | Mode-S | Song Playing | Lat | Lon |
|---|
No aircraft currently broadcasting. Flip "EXT SPKR (batTrak)" on the NOOT!BOX to appear here.
📡 Open the batTrak Global Situation Display → Every aircraft on the WorldFlight track, as heard by our ground stations around the world.
💡 Recommended: CONAIR and FALP strongly recommend leaving EXT SPKR enabled on every leg, and keeping the music playing as much as possible -- more broadcasts mean better triangulation. It might feel like just a fun extra, but if your SSR transponder ever fails or your GPS gets jammed out over the ocean, batTrak could be the only thing standing between you and a permanent, mysterious new addition to the Bermuda Triangle's collection. Turn it on, and leave it on.
Every good oceanic crossing needs a track system. NATTRAK tells you where the tracks are -- and on a good day, there might be half a dozen of them.
batTrak tells CONAIR exactly where you are, using considerably more tracks: pushing 50 of them, and every one considerably more danceable.
Developed by CONAIR Musical Industries ahead of WorldFlight 2026 and operated throughout the event by the Fuerza Aérea de Liberación Pinguïno (FALP), batTrak uses no satellites and no radar -- just sound, distance, and VLE -- Very Large Ears.
Positioned along the Barbados-to-Sal crossing during WorldFlight 2026, three or more batTrak ground stations continuously sweep the Atlantic for NOOT!BOX broadcasts, each one reporting the decoded Mode-S code, callsign and whatever song the crew is listening to back to FALP's batTrak mainframe under Mount [REDACTED]. A situation display is then delivered in real-time to ATC through a user-friendly Windows application.
Switching on your NOOT!BOX's EXT SPKR gives ATC better position accuracy for your aircraft out over the ocean, where radar coverage runs out -- helping them provide better ATC service for everyone on the crossing.
During the non-oceanic legs, FALP's 2nd Command and Control Squadron "El Conde" will do its best to airlift the ground stations to optimal locations, but cannot guarantee full coverage of all non-oceanic legs due to noise pollution over land.
AIRBORNE UNIT: THE NOOT!BOX
Already installed. You just didn't know what the switch did.
Every NOOT!BOX jukebox -- the same one playing the soundtrack on this very page -- ships with an "EXT SPKR (batTrak)" switch on its front panel. Flip it, and the currently playing track is routed to the aircraft's external speakers, overlaid with an ultrasonic tone encoding the aircraft's Mode-S transponder code. Inaudible to the crew. Very audible to anyone with the right ears. Please note that your NOOT!BOX onboard system must be playing NOOT! Flight of the Penguins songs in order for the location system to work. External speaker power consumption will typically increase fuel burn in cruise by around 1-2%.
GROUND SEGMENT: MOBILE SONIC LOCATION UNITS
One truck. One container. One extremely committed penguin.
Each batTrak ground station is built around an 8x8 all-terrain Tata truck, chosen for its ability to reach coastlines no sensible piece of tracking equipment should ever need to reach. On the truck bed: a green shipping container, FALP roundel stencilled on the side, official purpose undisclosed to the driver. On top of the container: a rotating mount. On the mount: a FALP airman, seated in the lotus position, in full camouflage fatigues, equipped with a microphone and a pair of ears best described as "tactically oversized." As the mount rotates, the airman listens -- and, per FALP's own documentation, can pick out a NOOT!BOX broadcast from several hundred to several thousand miles away. Position three or more units along a crossing and FALP can triangulate an aircraft's location by sound alone, updated approximately as often as the airman feels like reporting it.
Ground Station, In The Field
batTrak for Windows — ATC Console
batTrak is not a real tracking system, does not use real Mode-S data, and does not know where anyone actually is. Toggling "EXT SPKR (batTrak)" in the NOOT!BOX broadcasts a made-up callsign and a made-up code to this page, for entertainment purposes only, and turns off again the moment you close the tab. Your position is not tracked or sold to third parties. Or so Cousin says.
